We’re Moving!

Tuesday, June 30th, 2009 @ 10:58 pm | News, Other

We’ve decided to use some of the billions of dollars we’ve made ripping people off to move to a brand new production facility in The Valley.

Effective July 1, 2009 The Asylum will be located in Burbank, California.

As much as we’ll miss the glamour of Hollywood (the traffic, the monthly drug raids in the parking lot, the transvestite prostitutes…), we’re very excited because we’re getting more than twice the space for about the same amount of rent.

So, starting tomorrow please send all hate mail and lawsuits here.

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    25 Responses to “We’re Moving!”

    1. Rick Says:

      Moving out to old studio country, maybe we’ll see a western or two pop forth?

    2. Admin Says:

      Rick, although the part of Burbank where we’re moving is pretty developed (could a western take place in IKEA?), you’ll be happy to learn that we are in development on our very first western.

      We have the script… we’re just waiting for the right opening in our production schedule.

    3. Rick Says:

      Very cool, can’t wait (huge fan of Sergio Lenoe).

    4. Filmguy450 Says:

      This is awfully exiciting! I am very glad you guys are exanding. So does this mean more produtions going on at the same time?

    5. You suck Says:

      You guys suck at making films. It is clear you are assholes. Stop piggybacking off other peoples titles and get a life. You really are assholes. y

    6. Kalebzilla Says:

      So you are moving to a new place. Huh?

    7. McHuge Says:

      Kick ass! An Asylum western?! Does your script have zombies? Cuz I had an idea for a Western – bear with me…

      A female gunfighter returns to a western town – she’s visiting the town of her father’s killer who is hosting an elimination gunfighting tournament. The prize is a huge pot of money, but not everyone is in it for the riches, some seek revenge, others respect – and some seek brains. What nobody knows is the town has a terrible secret that the gunfighters will soon find out – and only one will escape the undead to tell it.

      I call it “The Fast and the Un-Dead”.

    8. Matt Says:

      You guys and your shitty movies can blow me.

    9. Martin Says:

      You guys should move to Michigan. They offer 40% on the films made in that state (if at least $50,000 is spent in MI)

      http://www.michigan.gov/filmoffice/0,1607,7-248–168008–,00.html

    10. Owen Says:

      Well the movies are shitty, but if you guys can make money out of it. I say it’s a novel idea. Good or bad, it’s an unique business idea. I think you guys deserve some credit.

    11. Johnny Lexicon Says:

      I can’t watch your films for more than a few minutes at a time, but I love the fact that you are making them and are making a business out of them. I also like the anger, bile and venom that your films inspire in some people. Keep up the good work. I salute your efforts. Please give me a job someday.

    12. Mega Fan Says:

      Congrats on the big move! Great things are happening! Keep your movies coming cause I’m always watching! Wishing you all the best!!

    13. asylum fucker Says:

      camouflaging your title is the sickest thing a sucker can do. and you guys do suck in making films. what a professional CON

    14. Scotch Says:

      Awesome! Good luck with the move! Keep the movies coming…I am anxiously awaiting SexPot! Looks great. Any new trailers coming? Love to see a glimpse of Land That Time Forgot and SexPot!

    15. Guestar57 Says:

      Maybe I’ll finally make an office visit,LOL !

    16. Anonymous Says:

      You guys simply rock, but just you, not your movies, i haven’t seen any but just from the trailers, oh.my.god. Still, a great buisness idea and you’re not doing anything illegal, also, please make a gallery with all your hate mails and lawsuits, would be very interesting.

    17. Matt Mosley Says:

      How do you guys find writers? (matt_mosley2006@yahoo.co.uk)

    18. Viktor Says:

      Dear company… you make me cry. I am more honest than I ever been in my life – you really make me cry. Are you seriously so heartless and greedy, you try to steal other movies and make the worst movies the world has ever seen, on purpose? Why? What could motivate anyone to do such a horrible act – and I mean it! I wouldn’t say this is as bad as to murder someone – NO. This is BY FAR WORSE!!! Do you realize what you are doing?!

    19. Admin Says:

      Oh, I forgot to mention… starting July 1 we’re also going to start murdering people.

    20. James Says:

      Well, atleast I know my money has gone to something good!
      Porn Capital of the World? Sounds like a good place, hope you get some, um, good stuff out

    21. Scotch Says:

      Ha-ha! You guys are awesome…Viktor, you need to chill out and stop taking things so seriously! Sheesh! Hey, the Valley, porn capital of the world! Maybe you guys will start putting a little more skin in your flicks, although I’m getting the feeling there will be no shortage of skin on display in Sex Pot! You guys rock!

    22. Thomas Says:

      Hi,

      When you come to France, can you hire me? I’ll do it for free as long as I die crushed by a giant robot or a horrible alien. Anyway, You could make a movie like :
      “Amélie from Champs Elysées”
      “The sixth element”
      “Stolen”, etc..

      Please let me in…

    23. Torin Says:

      Look, guys, you obviously know something about making films. This leads me to wonder why you spend it on making crappy (no offense) mockbusters! If you made a few good films, you would make more money anyway! Holy crap, its not rocket science, but what really pisses me off is that you are stuck up enough to feel that you can get away with this! Personally, I hate the hollywood system and major corporations can take a hike, but I HOPE Fox sues you. Maybe then, the endless pollution of shitty straight-to-DVD films from my local rental store will at LEAST be free from “Snakes On A Train”.
      What I want to see is you reviving releases of films like “Zombie Bloodbath 2″, or recent films with similar content. Man, I’m 15, and my movies are getting a DVD release through a company thats NOT my own! They aren’t great compared to others, I can admit that, but at least they’re better than goddam SNAKES ON A TRAIN!
      In conclusion, if you WANT people to watch your films, as I have heard, then make them worth watching!

    24. Positive thinker...drinker Says:

      You know what i’ve noticed. these are spoofs/parodies without trying. Because if you look at the camp that keeps making those genre movies (Scary movie, Date movie, Disaster movie, etc) they’ve gotten worse and worse with each film. Where you guys are being consistent, not original, but consistent nonetheless. I applaud you guys and your efforts at movie making. Oh and can we get some more zombie movies in the catalouge? please and thank you :)

    25. Matt Mosley Says:

      BARE KNUCKLE (in the vein of FIGHTING … but better)

      When Mark Miller is introduced to the underground world of bare-knuckle fighting, he sees it as an easy way of paying off his medical bills. But when he’s done fighting, the man who pulls all the strings isn’t about to let him walk away quietly.

      worth a try :)

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