CNNMoney, that is:
Archive for May, 2011
We’ve just returned from the Cannes, where we had our best market ever in the history of The Asylum (sorry, haters, we’re set for the next couple years…). But we also heard a disturbing bit of news from some of our friends who were also selling movies: Apparently, some Buyers were coming to meetings armed with IMDB ratings for the films they were considering.
This didn’t happen to us, but in between meetings, I checked and discovered that the average rating for our films over the last two years was a little over 3.0 (I did the math, you can check it).
Now, I’m a big fan of IMDB. The $100 a year I spend on the Pro version is the best investment Ive ever made. I use it every single day. But never to check the ratings of movies.
As I’ve mentioned before, I don’t pay attention to the ratings or reviews on IMDB because I am absolutely convinced that the only people who review films on the site are 11 year old boys and other basement dwellers.
How could it be otherwise? If you’re a person who spends your time writing reviews on IMDB, you obviously don’t have a job. Or a girlfriend. There’s no benefit to you, like queue recommendations. All you get is a platform for self-indulgent ranting (sort of like a blog).
My theory is further supported by the fact that Fan Boy favorites maintain higher than average MovieMeter ratings than other films. Sucker Punch was #1 on the MovieMeter long after the film disappeared from the box office charts.
I realize that MovieMeter “interest” in a movie isn’t the same thing as a rating, but any statistical data without controls are meaningless. I personally know of several filmmakers who have artificially boosted their IMDB ratings by getting their friends to positively review their movies (uh… I’ve maybe even done it myself…).
On the other hand, I’m also a believer in the old adage that “if three people tell you you’re drunk, you’d better lie down.” I looked at the recent Studio movies and saw that they average around 7.0 (I didn’t do the math, I just kinda eyeballed it). They spend at least 100 times more money on their movies than we do, so I guess it makes sense that they’re rated higher. Maybe the ratings are statistically accurate. Maybe our movies are only “3s.”
I just hope our buyers don’t start checking…
Our newest horror film stars Bill Oberst, Jr. (pictured) as the latest in a long line of sheriffs cursed by the witches of Salem, Massachusetts.
Filmed in native 3D, A HAUNTING IN SALEM will be released on August 23, 2011 on DVD, VOD, and Blu Ray.
This one is going to be creepy…
Rimawi and I are busy selling our films at the Cannes Market and I’m using the time between meetings to catch up with some of the correspondence we receive from “fans.”
Despite my best efforts to insulate our employees, there are still emails from people who feel it’s necessary to let everyone on our staff know they need help:
I am writing to you today to express how awful this film 200mph is. I for one have watched some terrible films in my time, but this takes it to a whole new level… …The budget for this film must have been less than I earn in a week at a bar. I have discussed this film with a friend, and it was decided it could be used as a torture method. If I owned a gun I would of been happy to shoot myself instead of watching this film. Please don’t have any satisfaction in taking peoplea (sic) money for watching this film, you are basically hooking people on the title, “200mph that sounds good,” then when you watch it, you resent the film so much. I will end my email here, but could happily go on about how bad this film is.
We also get the occasional message that appears sincere:
About two weeks ago, I was fired from my job, where I had been working for
the past 12 years. It was the lowest I’ve ever felt. Well, a friend of
mine got me a subscription for Netfilx instant to keep me occupied while I
look for a new job. One of the things he suggested I watch was Mega Shark
Versus Giant Octopus. It totally blew me away. Since then, I’ve been on a mission to watch everything The Asylum has put
out. … Anyway, the purpose of this letter was just to say thank you for keeping a
smile on my face during a tough time in my life. …Truth be told, I would take your
films any day of the week over the crap that is in theaters now days.
The major studios expect me to shell out big bucks to watch what is,
essentially, a two-hour long commercial for whatever product paid to be
placed in the film? No, thank you. Long live The Asylum, and the wonderful people who make it possible!
And those that appear less so:
Dear Geniuses at the Asylum, THIS MOVIE WAS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was incredibly realistic, and I jumped at every scene. Especially in the beginning when Emma told the other guy to cut the engine, and the controls were SOOOOO realistic and high tech! I don’t how you guys have nearly enough money to create such a classic film. I seriously thought it was a real shark that jumped 5000 feet in the air and took out the airplane. AND when they landed, there wasn’t even a splash!!!WOW that shark has some crazy diving skills, huh?! The actors were also incredible, I felt as if they were playing themselves and not even acting! I’m willing to spend another hour and a half of my life to watch the sequel, especially since the ending left viewers with so many questions. …Please be sure to use the same actors, and the same cut scenes that you guys used over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. The editing was also by far top class and seamless. I seriously thought Michael Bay, Steven Spielberg, David Fincher, Ridley Scott, James Cameron, and Jesus Christ all fused their brains together and came up with this epic film. …Keep it up guys, this was definitely by far the best movie I’ve seen in my entire life.
And, of course, we can always expect a few particularly lovely sentiments. My wife especially appreciated this one:
I hope the collective families of everyone working at The Asylum die slow painful deaths of grotesque diseases.
Still on very, very rare occasions, the criticisms are actually clever enough to make me laugh, like this one about 200 MPH:
this movie title should be 2shity2watch
And you might think from reading stories like this one that the two films are somehow in competition.
We actually hope that the Paramount film kicks ass!
You see, we have discovered that when the big budget film we’re drafting on is a hit, our Mockbuster is also a hit (on a much more modest scale of course), and, conversely, when the studio version bombs, ours usually does too.
So we wish Thor the best of luck and hope it has the same success in North America that it did in the rest of the world.
Of course, we also hope you’ll stay home on Saturday night and watch ALMIGHTY THOR on Syfy.